Addiction, Support:

15 Common Signs Of Addiction

30 Apr 2011 by Recovering You, 4 Comments »

Living with an addict, loving an addict, relationship with an addict


I? guessing someone you love is exhibiting a few behaviors you’re not completely sure about. Perhaps you?e seen them engage in increasingly regular binges of drink, drugs, or gambling. Maybe you?e simply noticed emotional changes. And the changes aren? good. Or somehow you just know something? wrong and you?e wondering if it? got something to do with the supposed ?ocial?activities our loved ones can get involved in.

And I? guessing you would like some way of knowing what you are dealing with. And whether you need to do anything.

Recently I talked about how important gut instinct is in considering whether a person you love is under the influence of addiction. The reason I talked about this is because addiction can be extremely cunning and will attempt to conceal itself for as long as possible. Sometimes, your instincts are the only, and best, indicator of whether sometime is going on.

But, if your instincts are off, or they?e been triggered but you want more proof here are 15 common signs of addiction that your loved one might be displaying. While some of these signs could also be due to stress or mental illness, if any are present, along with a sense or evidence that substance or behavioral abuse is a factor, you could be dealing with an addiction problem.

  • Change in sleeping patterns
  • Theft or unexplained loss of property
  • More regular illness (coughs, colds etc)
  • Breaking promises
  • Irritability and mood swings
  • Abdicating responsibilities
  • Weight loss or weight gain
  • Irrational behaviors
  • Depressed or withdrawn
  • Poor finances
  • Making excuses to indulge
  • Lying and manipulative behaviours
  • Decreased self care
  • Loss of meaningful relationships
  • Lack of concentration

Addiction doesn? always present itself like we imagine it might, before we have any experience of it. Some of the most severe addicts wouldn? raise the suspicions of most people. My husband was one of these people. He held down a job, he had a very successful football career, a son, a home, friends and a loving family. He was also seriously addicted to alcohol, drugs and gambling but in order to protect his addiction, he maintained an extremely tight cover that kept him under the radar.

But for those willing to risk looking a little closer, the signs were there and he displayed nearly all of those mentioned above. When his shroud came down fully in recovery, it was clear to see just how obvious it all really should have been but in love we all looked for the best instead. Or we looked away.

Don’t be afraid to notice the signs if they are there, or to trust yourself in what you see, hear or sense. Only with awareness, can we begin to protect ourselves, and our loved ones from addiction.

Photo credit:photo ?2007? Redvers

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  3. Maj says:

    I know my husband is an addict, I’ve known for a long time. He knows too and says he wants to change. He’s going to stop tomorrow, he’s been promising me this for the last 11 years. Tomorrow never comes.
    There is always a crisis which he just needs some weed to help him get through. If I say we don’t have enough money (which is often true) he picks a fight in which I am to blame for all the troubles we face as a couple and as a family. Eventually I usually give for the sake of some peace. I am a pro at magicking up $20 although it usually means creative accouting, we’re behind on our bills and the kids know all to well that we can’t afford to do whatever it is they want to do,
    I am now on the path to recovery. I simply cannot support my addict financially anymore. I am making a future for myself and my kids (by retraining) while still living with my addict and trying to keep the family unit together but in doing so I have had to stop work to focus on my studies which has given him more ammo. It’s only been two weeks since my last pay and I’ve already been accused of stealing “his” money (to pay our bills).
    I expect I have many more difficult days and weeks to come and appreciate any advice. I am so glad I found this website.

    • Recovering You says:

      Hi Maj

      Thank you for stopping by.

      First of all, a huge credit to you for making the decision to take your future into your own hands, and to retrain for a better income and lifestyle for you and your children. It takes a massive commitment to leave paid work, to study, especially in your current situation.

      In regards to your husband’s response to the change though, his accusations are simply a deflection. A way of finding something to put the heat on you, rather than face up to what he has been doing to the family situation for so long. It’s all guilt and shame that he is expressing. Don’t let his words keep you from doing what you are doing. Keep on moving forward and keep looking towards YOUR future, that may or may not have him as part of it. What matters most is your children and you right now, because you can’t control what your husband is doing.

      Yes, there will be many more difficult days as long as your husband remains trapped by his addiction. Reinforce yourself with the vision of your future, with the positive and empowered plans you are putting in place, and take one day at a time to move towards them. You can do it!

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