Addiction, Recovery:

Unhook From Tomorrow So Today Is Easier

16 Apr 2012 by Recovering You, 2 Comments »

Trusting an addict?he supreme value is not the future but the present….Whoever builds a house for future happiness builds a prison for the present.?- Octavio Paz

Somewhere out there is a life you dream of, the life you hoped for.

Perhaps where you stand today is quite different? In fact so different that you can? ever imagine getting to that place, where life is simple, easy, happy and loving.

Or maybe you just imagine a future where a single thing is different?

Maybe that single thing is not having addiction in your life.

Yet, that possibility can be so difficult to believe in.

Because today feels so hard.

Because that might mean letting go of the person you love.

You look out into your ideal future and you wonder what it takes to get to there, star gazing in a world where there are no lies, no betrayals, no drink, drugs or gambling.

You hold an imaginary future up as your measure against what you have today and you become increasingly resentful and dissatisfied with the reality.

And you wonder:

Why can? life be more like all those dreams I have for it?
Why can? they be more like what I hope they can be?
Why can? I have what I want now?

Because those things you want are more than one step away.

Because there will be many steps to take, day by day, to get to where you are going.

I have this image printed up at home to remind my husband and I every day about the journey we have taken, and the incredible possibilities of where we can still go.

Emotional Detachment

Because where we are today is so different than where I dreamed about being when we were in the darkness of addiction. What I hoped for pales in comparison to what I have today.

No wishing or dreaming would ever have got us here.

Consciously and deliberately facing each and every day did though.

Holding on too tightly to what could be causes you to become even more impatient, angry and clouded by what you actually have in front of you today.

That? not to say you should let go of your vision, for a sober, clean loved one, for a life that is free of addiction and the many difficulties it comes with. Know what you want, know what is important to you and trust that what you desire is possible.

Secure all of that in your heart and then move forward with dealing with the reality of today.

Let today be fully undertaken with presence of mind and with the purpose of making this moment as best as it can be.

Today is enough.

Today holds all the lessons.

Today holds all the possibilities.

I? sure you?e heard it before but it? true. Today is all we have, so, today give everything you have.

To YOU, to life, and to love.

And tomorrow, do it all again.

Wishing and hoping that you were in a different situation keeps you hooked into a future that hasn? happened yet.

It won? change a single thing about today and it won? take away the hurt, the pain, the despair you have felt.

I know you want more, because I?e been there.

I also know that only by accepting what is today, by dealing with the circumstances you have in front of you, can you begin to take control of YOUR situation.

Accepting doesn? mean agreeing with or liking what is happening. It simply means accepting that which already is, and knowing you have all the power to choose how to respond to it.

Do what is most loving and intelligent for you, what is most appropriate and loving for your addict and what is most needed and important for the other people around you just for today.

Instead of casting your happiness into a future that hinges precariously on your loved ones recovery, get the good out of today, without changing a single thing other than the focus of your thoughts.

When you can move through wishing, into acceptance, you can focus on what YOU need for today.

You can let go of the overwhelm of trying to work our how you can leap from where you are now to that place where everything is ?ixed?

And just know, that with each step, each day, you are taking a journey that has much more to offer right now, than a destination that could prove to be a mirage.

Use your precious energy to be most resourceful for making the present valuable. Don? spend it on hoping for a tomorrow you can? control.

Your future could be incredible. It could be more than you believe is possible.

But it takes one step at a time to get there.

Don? miss out on what? important and good here, now, because you have your sights set all the way over there.

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  1. Debra Rincon Lopez says:

    I was going to do it for all the wrong reasons. but now I decided I want to do it for me. That’s the only way that I can & I will live the rest of my life without drugs or alcohol ever again. I can safely say I am RECOVERED. I don’t care who says it’s not possible. It is my REALITY.

    • Rachael says:

      Congratulations on your REALITY. I am so proud of you. I have seen recovery with my own eyes and it is absolutely possible when we return to ourselves, and our truth. Thank you for visiting : )

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